Hey Jude! I have a friend, my best friend, who is getting more distant with me because she is getting closer to our other friend. Me and a few people know that they like each other and are most likely going to start dating soon. I already know that shes not going to be my best friend forever, but the thought of being left behind by them both scares me. What should I do?
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Hi love!
Thanks for reaching out to Asking Jude. It’s completely understandable that you might feel scared and anxious in this situation. Friendships can always evolve, and sometimes that comes with changes in the dynamics. In this situation, I think it is important to acknowledge and take some time to process your feelings.Â
Something you can consider is having a conversation with your friend to tell her how you’re feeling, and hopefully how she’s feeling too. If you share your thoughts and concerns with her, it shows how you still care deeply about your friendship no matter how it ends up with the other friend. It is also possible that she’s not fully aware of how you’re feeling about your evolving friendship, so talking to her may lead to a better understanding and more honest relationship between you two. I have linked a few articles that have some helpful coping strategies on how to handle situations like this.Â
https://psychcentral.com/health/why-feeling-left-stings-and-healthy-ways-to-copeÂ
https://www.healthline.com/health/feeling-left-outÂ
You could also try focusing on your other friendships. While it may hurt to see your best friends drifting away, building strong friendships with other people can help alleviate your fears of being left behind. Always remind yourself that change, while it may be challenging, can actually be helpful and open up new doors for new connections and experiences.Â
Overall, communication and exploring other activities are important. Remember to be honest and understanding with your friends, and don’t forget to prioritize yourself. While friendships may come and go, they have the potential to bring new and positive relationships and experiences to your life.Â
Best of luck!
Irene <3