There's a pick me girl that had beef with me two years ago and she still does over nothing. It is annoying how she gets attention from all the random guys and she knows that her personality is fake. When confronting her, she always gaslights and play the victim. It sucks always having to compete with her over male attention but her simps are glued to her constantly and want to fuck her. They also send her money to view her ass and tit pics (that's how she gain followers and want attention).
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Hi there,
It sounds like you are dealing with a person who is stubborn and unwilling to change. Something that may help is asking yourself what you are gaining from your relationship with this person. Do the two of you have a genuine friendship aside from this issue? If so, is this behavior something you can move past? Unfortunately, you cannot control the behavior of others, but you can control how you respond to their behavior. Real friends should appreciate your uniqueness and have no interest in competing with you. You have done everything you can by confronting her, and from now on, the simplest thing I can suggest is to ignore her.
Do not fall into her competition, even when she irritates you. I know that is easier said than done, especially if it feels like her actions are intentional, but you cannot control her actions. You should also consider whether or not you genuinely want to be in a relationship with the same guys who are interested in her. Here is an article that discusses healthy romantic relationships in greater detail: https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/tips-for-finding-lasting-love.htm. You should always strive to be yourself; never try to change your personality to please others. The right partner should love the purest version of you, accompanied by all your flaws and unique traits.
If you two have had conflict in the past, it is possible that she is doing these things to provoke a negative reaction from you. Unfortunately, there isn’t much you can do about that. The only thing you can do is focus on yourself. Focusing on yourself is a great way to build confidence. This confidence may make her angry, but this has nothing to do with her. Here are some tips on how to gain confidence: https://www.mind.org.uk/for-young-people/feelings-and-experiences/confidence-and-self-esteem/.
Being confident is not about being better than another person, it is about being comfortable enough in your own skin that the actions of others cannot affect you. I know all of this is easier said than done; developing a strong sense of confidence is often a lengthy process of trial and error. It is hard to ignore someone who doesn’t want to be ignored, and it will take time and effort to move through this challenge.
Also, while many people rely on social media for distraction, sometimes it is healthy to take a break. Limiting your screen time can be particularly helpful in this situation because if you are not on social media, you won’t know about the likes and follows she’s getting from guys. If you aren’t comfortable with taking a break, perhaps unfollowing this girl may help. Here are some tips on how to do a social media cleanse, and how to recognize when it is necessary:
https://www.hackensackmeridianhealth.org/en/healthu/2022/12/23/when-to-take-a-break-from-social-media.
I hope some of this information was helpful. Please do not hesitate to reach out to Asking Jude again if you have any further questions.
Take care,
Andrea