I've been depressed for years, and lately it feels like it's only getting worse. I started seeing a therapist, but I've had three different therapists in the past, and I never felt like I improved. One actually did more harm than good and put me off therapy for a while, which definitely didn't help. I just want to feel okay, but I don't know if that's even possible anymore. Everything feels overwhelming, and I don't feel like there's anyone aside from my therapist that I can talk to. I'm worried that the way I'm feeling will affect the way I act and drive my friends away. It feels like it already has, and I just want to scream or tell them or do both and apologize for being the way that I am but I can't. So I get trapped in this cycle of anxiety and sadness and then isolation and regret, and I wonder if it's ever going to end.