My friends never seem to check how im doing, I have people who I haven’t spoken to in months because I stopped texting first. The only friends I talk to I do because Im checking in on them. Recently a friend texted asking me for advice but then told me she came to me because her other friends were busy. It hurts because it makes me feel like I don’t really mean much to others and Im only there for the fun times. I have a hard time staying in contact with people so it might just be my own fault
top of page
bottom of page
I'm addressing this to both Srija and Anonymous: There's something about all of this new technology that makes it easy for people to relate to one another in a superficial manner ; i.e., the way that it's so convenient seems connected to the way that a person using any of the devices to not really put thought into what they're saying. I have a laptop, nothing else. When I'm ready to post my writing at Tumblr, I use a personal computer at a local business. Period. This is going to sound weird: I'm glad that I don't spend much time at social media sites...
Thank you for reaching out to Asking Jude. It is completely normal to feel this way, and in order to know who cares about you, you must define what caring about you means. This sounds obvious, but just as everyone has different wants and needs, everyone’s definition of care will differ. There’s no right or wrong answer for what a caring friend is. However, if you never define what you’re looking for, no one is going to fit that definitio. As a result, you won’t be satisfied.
With your definition, you can now start seeing which friends do care about you. Start small and talk to a few friends first. This isn’t going to be easy, and you’re going to have to be as honest as you can. As much as you want to believe some people could be great friends, if you haven’t been having nice conversations with them or if you barely speak to each other, this isn’t a person who is likely to care. This doesn't mean you can't be friends, but may just mean that your relationship is not at that level yet.
Furthermore, if you’ve made any agreements or promises, it’s good to think back to friends who have stayed true to their words and proved to be trustworthy individuals. After all, there are good friends who keep their promises. However, if they do not care much about a person, they may care very little about fulfilling that promise. That is not a sign of someone who cares about you.
Finally, try having meaningful conversations with them. This may help you better understand if your friends truly care about your friendship. If you feel comfortable and close enough to some people, you can even try sharing how your feel. Let your friends know how you feel and see how they respond. You can tell a lot from their response to your current feelings towards them.
Once you’ve found people who care about you, you will have established a personal criterion for the type of people for who you are looking. You have people who care about you, and you now know how to find out if someone really does have your best interests at heart.
Here are some links that you may find helpful:
Hope this helps,