Hey there so I’m in a pickle, I am married, we’re days away from celebrating our 3rd anniversary and we have been fighting non stop (most of our marriage is fights honestly), But at the point we are at now you can tell no matter how much growth we’ve each had it still isn’t enough. There is no emotional or physical connection between us. We don’t really talk unless it’s about the kids, she tells me my communication sucks and I’m immature for having a hard time talking to her- but I have told her I’ve grown in that area I’m just not good with confrontation and when she’s mad she gets super aggressive which shuts me down. I know it’s on both of us so she started over compensating those short comings with a constant aggressive affection — and I’m not a very affectionate person at least on the level she is so it’s a huge push and pull in our relationship and now I just feel so absolutely disconnected from her I don’t feel anything towards her right now: we haven’t physically touched in 4 days and that’s as little as a hug, we haven’t been romantic in 4 months (before that it was 7 months) she refuses to touch me that way and won’t have any intimacy even make out a little if we aren’t emotionally bonded and I’ve expressed my need for more in that area but she doesn’t want to try, so last night I asked her if she wanted to do a relationship question game that’s supposed to make you feel closer— as we did it, we fought, had petty answers, got irritated, and I asked if she felt closer she said Yuuuppp and I was like well I don’t, you said the only thing special about our marriage is we sleep in the same bed…. like we aren’t similar, we don’t get along often, BUT there is love she says we should end our marriage when she’s mad and then when she’s over it she says she’s fighting for us by staying knowing it won’t change. I literally don’t know what to do anymore…. I don’t know how I feel, if we should stay married and just keep trying to see if this gets better or if we should separate.
I know this is a long winded thing, I appreciate any sort of advice Thank you!