Hey Jude! I am in a bit of a panic spiral, I currently struggle with disordered eating and it has been getting worse since last month in the sense that i try to make myself vomit my food out. It is mostly under control, and I eat three normal-ish sized meals but I had a burger two hours ago and it is getting harder to resist the urge to throw it up. I've been feeling icky sicky for a while and can feel the burger rising up my throat. I hate feeling this way so much, I have important exams in 23 days and I just cannot deal with disordered eating, I feel so helpless and all over the place. How do I get myself to stop feeling like I have to throw up after eating meals or just eat normally without feeling sick?
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Thank you so much for reaching out to Asking Jude for advice. I’m very sorry to hear about your struggles with disordered eating. I can only imagine how difficult this must feel, especially with approaching deadlines. Since I’m not a medical professional, I am not in the position to give you medical advice on coping with disordered eating. I can, however, offer you resources that may be more helpful to you. If you do not have a therapist at the moment, I strongly recommend reaching out to one that specializes in eating disorders. One website you can try is Open Path Collective (https://openpathcollective.org/find-a-clinician/?address=&distance=50&n=ðnicity=&active=undefined&remote=&age=&language=&modality=&specialties=&treatment=&pagination=0), which allows users to choose their counselors based on different criteria. Under the “Specialities” option, you can select “Eating Disorders.”
Something else you can try is the National Eating Disorders website (https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/help-support/contact-helpline), which has chat, phone, and text message options with trained volunteers. The site also offers treatment provider locations, information on recovery (https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/learn/general-information/recovery), and other articles relating to eating disorders. This can be an especially great resource if you don’t feel ready for therapy yet or if you already have a therapist.
In addition, this link offers tips on eating after and during eating disorder recovery: https://www.verywellmind.com/regular-eating-for-eating-disorder-recovery-4109419.
I also suggest confiding in people you trust about your situation. Dealing with an eating disorder is difficult in and of itself, but it can feel worse if you feel you have to go through this alone. Are you able to talk to your parents (or other trusted individual) about this? If so, maybe they can help support you by going with you to a doctor’s appointment or offering you a safe space to express what you are feeling. This link can help with opening up to the trusted individual(s): https://www.mhanational.org/time-talk-talking-your-parents
I know all of this is even more stressful with upcoming exams. If you are able to get extensions on your exams, I encourage you to reach out to your professors to ask. They may be understanding and grant you later exam dates.
Lastly, here is an article about fighting nausea that may be helpful for you: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/8106-nausea--vomiting.
Asking Jude wishes you the best on your journey to recovery. We are here to support you, so please do not hesitate to reach out again.
Sending you love and support,
Hi, @isabelle moon (what a beautiful name)! We just received your submission, and Helen will be getting back to you shortly. Until then, stay strong!